Funeral Etiquette

Do you need to attend a funeral but don’t know what is expected of you? You’re not the only one.

Before you find yourself faced with the need to attend a funeral or visitation, arm yourself with knowledge of proper funeral etiquette so you don’t commit a faux-pas. While each funeral is different, there are some things most of them have in common.

At some point in everyone’s life, funeral attendance is inevitable. However, due to the somber and often depressing nature of the topic, very few people like to talk about it. Not exactly a common party subject, discussion of funeral etiquette has become something most people don’t research until they absolutely have to.

Rather than letting the fear of attending a funeral get the best of you, learn the basics of proper etiquette. These frequently asked questions cover many of the concerns most people have if they have never attended or haven’t attended a funeral in a long time.

The most important thing to remember is that the primary reason for your presence at the funeral, memorial service, or visitation is to show your sympathy and support for the family members of the deceased.

Frequently Asked Questions

A funeral visitation gives people an opportunity to show respects to the family.

You’ll speak to the surviving family members and offer your condolences.

The first few rows at a church or funeral home are typically reserved for family members. If you aren’t in this group, choose a seat behind the reserved section. The pews are often marked with small signs.

The main responsibility of the pallbearers is to carry the casket from the coach to either inside a church or to the gravesite. This is a position of honor.

Many people wonder about whether or not to take their children to funerals. Consider whether the child can behave throughout the service. If your child has never been to a funeral, explain the basics before you leave home. There are special considerations if the deceased person is a family member. Each situation should be handled individually.

No words can express the depth of loss of a loved one. However, a few kind words will let the family know that you care.

Not only are they appropriate, but they also provide comfort to the family of the deceased.

In many cultures, food is a way to show respect and care for those grieving the loss of a family member.

It’s best to send flowers to the funeral home or to the home of the deceased’s immediate family.

Important to Remember

The main purpose of having etiquette rules for funerals, memorial services, and visitations is to create a sense of order that provides comfort for the loved ones of the deceased. Each religion and custom has elements that hold symbolic meaning. Since everyone will eventually face loss, nearly every faith has developed traditions as a foundation to guide mourning.

Many funeral directors offer flexibility to tailor funerals to the family’s needs and wishes. If you have any questions or concerns, whether you are planning a funeral or attending one, you can always ask someone from the funeral home or the officiant. They are accustomed to helping and answering these questions with care.